From God’s Own Country …


Yes, I am a Malayalee and proud of it. My roommate keeps saying that all my likes and dislikes are based on the fact that I am from Kerala.

My favourite cicketer – Sreeshanth.

My favourite Bollywood actress – Vidya Balan

My favourite Bollywood actor – John Abraham

I am not sure myself whether they are biased, but yeah these are my favourites.

There  are a truckload of things said about us. I am not really sure how many of them are true though.

Our Accent – Yes, that is true. Many of the Keralaites (including myself) are stuck with an accent. Not very pleasing to the ears. In fact it is very funny.

Coconut trees / Banana Trees – Yeah, that seems true. It is also the reason why we love coconut oil and banana chips. Most easily available. We don’t cook our food in coconut oil (I guess), we use vegetable oil (I think).

All Malayalee girls always have oil dripping out of their hair – Well, this one I am not too sure about. I studied in Kerala for 2 years, and I didn’t see many of that sort. I don’t know if that was the trend earlier, but it isn’t now atleast.

All Malayalees can drink like a fish – Not true. I know of so many Malayalees who do not touch alcohol. I know of so many non Malayalees who can gulp down any amount of alcohol. So its not that all malayalees can drink, it is just that Malayalees drink.

Half of Kerala is in the Middle East – True, there are many Malayalees out there. I myself was a NRI for the first 18 years of my life. My parents have been there for nearly 30 years now. But then, hey, it is not just Middle East, try going to any bakery in Bangalore, and voila, there is a Malayalee there.

Malayalam is a tough language – True. It is very tough. I struggled to learn it. The tongue gets twisted in very awkward ways.

Songs like “Hotel Keralafonia” and “I am a Malayalee” are very funny, and parts of it are true. If you haven’t heard those songs, please do right away. Freaking Hilarious.

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Posted on February 19, 2012, in General Stuff and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 10 Comments.

  1. Haha Mallus rock man :D But ur fav cricketer being sri santh is korachu over

  2. We had a Mallu senior at college..I overheard him saying to his friend, ‘Where is my my money?’ (In typical mallu accent..mani) you had to hear it to blow your ribs out with laughter like I bursted..typical Lola kutty style, man..hyuk!

  3. Give yourself some credit, only sheer genius can make songs like Hotel Keralafornia :P
    P.S. ur initials read APJ? how cool’s that?? o.o

  4. Thats true.. Sheer Genius.. and yeah.. I realised bout it being APJ back wen i was in the 12th.. been pleased.. except wen friends decide to drop the A, and stick to PJ… :P

  5. Accent is ok, but Bad English pronunciation is BAD.

    Examples of Manglish are:

    kangaroo (the worst offended word, Malayalees pronounce as “kanGAROO” instead of “KANgroo”)

    mixed, fixed (pronounced as ‘miksed’, ‘fiksed’ instead of ‘miksd’, ‘fiksd’)

    bear, pear, wear (pronounced as ‘biyar’, ‘piyar’, ‘wiyer’ instead of ‘beye’, ‘peye’, ‘weye’)

    beer (pronounced as “biiir” instead of “biye”)

    auto (pronounced as “aaato” instead of “otto”)

    Queen (prounounced as “kyuun” instead of “kween”)

    form (pronounced as ‘farum’ instead of “fom”)

    biennale (pronounced as “binale” instead of “bienale”)

    place names – Ohio, Seattle, Utah (pronounced as “ohiyo, seetl, ootha” instead of “ohayo, siyatl, yuta”)

    tortoise (pronounced as ‘tortois’ instead of “totis” )

    turtle (pronounced as ‘turrrtil’ instead of “tutl” )

    Mascot Hotel (pronounced as “muskut HOtel” instead of “MAScot hoTEL”)

    heart (pronounced as ‘hurrt’ instead of “haat”)

    bass (pronounced as ‘baas’ instead of “beis”)

    twitter (pronounced as “tyooter” instead of “twiter”)

    birthday (pronounced as “birthaday” instead of “buthdei”)

    garage (pronounced as “garej” instead of “gaRAZH/gaRAJ”)

    chassis (pronounced as “chasis” instead of “shasi”)

    divorce (pronounced as “daiverse” instead of “divors”)

    February (pronounced as “fibruari” instead of “februari”)

    one (pronounced as “onn” instead of “wun”)

    pizza (pronounced as “pisa” instead of “pitza”)

    our (pronounced as “avar” instead of “aue”)

    flour (pronounced as “flower” instead of “flaue”)

    alarm (pronounced as “alarum” instead of “alaam”)

    volume (pronounced as “vaalyam’ instead of “volyum”)

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